


The Story of Two Cosmic Clowns Who Fell in Love

by ALovelyLitwit



Category: Roswell New Mexico (TV 2019)
Genre: Absolute Silliness, Fluff, M/M, Meet Ugly AU, Sexual Content, background Maribel - Freeform, lots of tropes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-24
Updated: 2020-10-01
Packaged: 2021-03-05 00:00:40
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 12,762
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25485100
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ALovelyLitwit/pseuds/ALovelyLitwit
Summary: Set in an AU where Alex is a CPA and Michael needs help doing his taxes. Love happens.
Relationships: Michael Guerin/Alex Manes
Comments: 180
Kudos: 256





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> An idea I've been playing with. Might continue; might not. Could be a thing I write when I'm in the mood for fun and silliness.

His last client leaves at 8:15. Alex cracks his neck and stretches his arms over his head. Tax day is always the worst, but at least he isn’t going to be stuck in the office until midnight this year. 

‘We’re leaving, boss!’ Liz shouts. Maria sticks her head in his office and gives a little wave. 

‘Take tomorrow off. Tell Liz. See y’all on Wednesday.’ Maria blows him a kiss and then they are both gone, their laughter echoing down the hallway and into freedom.

Alex sighs and starts shutting down his computer. His thoughts drift to the song he is working on and how he finally has time to get back to his true love. At least they’d had a good tax season. Revenues up 15% over the previous year. Maybe he’ll actually be able to record something professionally.

Just as he is putting his laptop bag over his shoulder, his door bursts open and a ball of chaotic energy comes barreling at him, papers shaking in his fist. ‘I need your help.’

And here it is. His newfound peace too good to be true. ‘We’re closed.’

‘No, please. I’m literally begging you. I’ll get on my knees if need be.’ The innuendo hits Alex hard. He takes a moment to drink the man in. He is a wreck - tousled mop of curls, wide golden eyes, and too much exposed chest hair. A silver and turquoise belt buckle completes the look. 

Alex swallows. So, he’s attractive. So what? ‘I said, we’re closed. Sorry. File an extension.’

‘I don’t know how to do that.’ The man shrugs, having the decency to look mildly ashamed.

Again, Alex sighs, deeply aggrieved. ‘Google it, cowboy.’ He moves from behind his desk and makes to bypass the handsome stranger, but said handsome stranger grabs his elbow to spin him around. Alex loses his balance, his prosthetic pinching uncomfortably. 

Next thing he knows, the cowboy’s arms are wrapped tightly around him, fingernails digging not unpleasantly into his back. ‘Whoa, man. I’m sorry.’ Their chests are pressed together and neither makes to move away. Alex watches the man’s tongue dart out, licking across his bottom lip. He feels his own tongue echo the movement. The cowboy grins. Cheeks flaming, Alex scrambles to get out of his grip.

‘My name’s Michael.’ He sticks out his hand. ‘Michael Guerin.’

But Alex is too afraid to touch him again and so just nods. ‘I’m Alex.’

Michael smirks at him. ‘Right, Alex Manes. Said so on the door.’ He pushes the crumpled papers back at Alex. ‘I can pay. Well, I can pay in installments, anyway. Or labor! I’m very handy.’

Alex desperately tries to pretend that his mind doesn’t immediately picture Michael’s long, calloused fingers wrapped around his cock. He shifts awkwardly back to his desk counting backwards from ten to calm himself and his ridiculous libido. Frustratingly reminded of how long it’s been since he’d slept with anyone. ‘I really think you should file an extension. That looks like a lot of paperwork.’

‘I do contract jobs, mostly. These are all my 1099s.’ He hands them over to Alex, their fingers lightly brushing. Alex jerks back like he’s been burned. Silently curses to himself. Shuffles through the documents as a distraction.

‘There has to be over a dozen forms here. You’re definitely filing an extension because I refuse to do any more than that tonight.’ He sits back down at his desk and pulls out his laptop.

‘Hot date?’ Michael bypasses the chairs meant for sitting and hops up on the desk. He starts fiddling with a stapler.

Alex snorts. ‘Yeah, with my dog. She’s probably starving. Thanks to you.’

Michael swings his legs around the desk so that his thigh and Alex’s arm are pressed together. ‘Does all this mean you’ll help me?’

But for Alex, words have lost all meaning. Michael’s thigh is hot – like, excessively so. And firm and inviting and too much. He tries to discreetly edge away from the contact, but Michael’s leg is having none of that. Where Alex goes so does that very thick, very sexy jean-clad thigh. He swallows. ‘The fee will be high.’

Michael’s face lights up. ‘That’s fine! Um, do you mind me paying in labor, though? Money might take literal years. As you’ll soon see. And the sign outside _does_ need some serious work.’

‘What’s wrong with my sign?’ Alex dares a glance up at Michael. It’s a mistake. All he sees is mouth and lip and teeth. Plus, he’d forgotten about the chest hair.

‘Besides the name, you mean?’ Michael cocks his head and raises an eyebrow.

Alex blushes. ‘It’s a long story.’

‘A long story?’ He leans back, hands bracing him from behind, thighs spreading. Alex longs to crawl between them and put his stupid expensive desk to work. See if he’d gotten his money’s worth.

‘Yeah. I lost a bet.’ He turns his eyes back to the computer screen.

‘So, not that long a story, then?’ Michael winks, badly – looking more like a muscle has spasmed. And that should be unattractive. Embarrassing even. Except Alex wants to watch him fail at winking for maybe the rest of his life.

This night must end. And end quickly.

‘Hey, at least Cosmic Clowns, CPA is memorable. And it’s got the whole alliteration thing going for it.’ Alex thinks vaguely of Kyle Valenti and that stupid bet. Knows his business’s name is unforgivable. But he’s ready to defend it to the death anyway.

Michael gives him a ‘yeah right’ look and nods his head pitifully. ‘Even clown schools don’t actually use the word ‘clown’ in their advertising.’

Alex scoffs. ‘Lies. You’re making that up.’ He finishes filing Michael’s extension and shuts the computer – hopefully, for the last time.

‘Google it, Captain.’ He looks down at Alex, reeking of self-satisfaction.

But all Alex hears is _that_ word. A word he thought he’d rid himself of years ago. It’s like a cold shower and a lava bath all at once. ‘Why did you call me Captain?’

The humor in Michael’s face disappears, reading Alex’s discomfort immediately. ‘Sorry. I’m just aware of who you are. Hero’s parade and all. Won’t happen again.’

Alex’s voice goes all business. ‘Your extension gives you six extra months to file. Well, I guess it gives me six extra months to file on your behalf. You can start work Wednesday morning. We open at 9.’ He gives Michael a thin smile, repacks his bag, and motions the other man forward.

They exit the building in silence. Michael turns to say goodbye, but Alex is already halfway down the block, limping slightly. Michael watches him climb into his Explorer and pull away. He tucks his keys back into his front pocket and decides to get a jump-start on fixing the cracked sign above him – half its lights dead or dying. Imagines the look of surprise on Alex’s face when he gets to work Wednesday morning. And who needs sleep with the promise of a beautiful boy with a pretty smile in their future? Certainly not Michael Guerin.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Michael's first day on the job.

On Wednesday, Alex gets to work and walks right under his newly refurbished sign without so much as a glance. Liz and Maria have both beat him to the office so the coffee is already brewing. When he walks into their tiny kitchen nook, he’s surprised to find not just Liz and Maria but Michael Guerin, too. The three of them already fast friends, heads leaning together like co-conspirators planning their next attack. It makes Alex uneasy. And if he’s being honest – jealous.

‘Hey Alex!’ Liz breaks herself away and gives him a quick hug. ‘We were just getting to know our new handyman. Did you see Michael fixed the sign?’

Alex shakes his head. ‘Sorry, I hadn’t noticed.’ He can hear how gruff he sounds. Tries to do better. ‘I’m sure it looks great.’

Michael smiles at him and pours the first cup of coffee, adds a splash of creamer and no sugar. Hands the cup to Alex. ‘No big deal. Just tightened a couple of the electrical connections, switched out the busted light bulbs, and welded the cracks along the bottom.’

‘And a new coat of paint! I love the color. Noticed it from blocks away.’ Maria pours her own cup of coffee and elbows Michael in the side. ‘He’s definitely worth whatever you’re paying him. Maybe more.’

He watches Michael wink down at her. Diverts his eyes and clears his throat. ‘Well, we’ve all got work to do. Files to clean up. So.’ He spins on his one heel and walks away. Desperately seeking the refuge of his office. But he can feel someone following him. Knows it’s Michael. Hates that it’s Michael.

Neither says anything until Alex is situated at his desk, laptop back in place and booting up. ‘I’ve made a list of things that could use your attention. Should keep you busy for a while.’ He searches for the file on his computer, avoids looking up at Michael.

‘That’s cool. Actually, I made a list, too. Based on the things I noticed Monday night. Hope you don’t mind.’ He pulls a small spiral notebook from his back pocket and flips through the pages. Hands it over to Alex.

The list is obnoxiously long. But not inaccurate. Except for the last item. Level Alex’s desk. ‘My desk is _perfectly_ level.’

‘My ass begs to differ.’ He flounces out of the room. Alex watches him go, not at all enjoying the view.

He returns with a level. And a shit-eating grin. Alex crosses his arms over his chest and wonders if he’s ever going to get any work done again. Especially as Michael walks behind him, arms coming around him, placing the level down on the desk in front of Alex. He’s so close Alex can smell his shampoo and the pleasant musk he’s beginning to recognize as particular to Michael.

Alex almost gasps when Michael’s chin lands on his shoulder, curls brushing along his neck. Poised to watch and wait as the level evens out. ‘Ha!’ The desk is not level. By a millimeter. Michael literally pumps his fist in the air. Alex bites his lip to keep from smiling.

‘That’s not enough to matter. I don’t even notice.’ But Michael just smirks at him and places a pencil at one end of the table. His eyes never leave Alex’s face as the pencil slowly rolls across the desk and onto the floor.

‘Fine.’ Alex sighs loudly. ‘You can fix my desk. And everything else on your list.’ He hands the notebook back to Michael. ‘Maybe you should stop by Liz and Maria’s desks, as well. Wouldn’t want any more pencils rolling themselves off cliffs.’

Michael looks like he wants to say something. Alex raises an eyebrow at him. But Michael just shrugs his shoulders and starts walking backwards toward the door. ‘Let me know if that desk gets any worse. I’m more than happy to move you up the list, boss.’ And then he’s gone.

Alex opens the last client folder he’d been working on Monday evening. Needs to clean up the tax documents and load them all into his filing software. But he can’t concentrate and so instead opens a new, fresh folder naming it ‘Guerin’. Michael’s 1099s are still scattered across his desk. He spends the rest of the morning completing Michael’s tax return.

Once the return is finished, he closes the folder and hides it in the blandly labelled ‘misc’ file on his desktop. Decides to wait a while before he submits the return, before he even tells Michael it’s done. Tries not to think too hard about the why of that decision.

At noon, Liz knocks on his door and throws herself in one of the leather chairs across from him. ‘I cleaned up all the small biz returns and they’re ready to be filed. Maria and I are taking Michael out to lunch. Want to come? It’s chilorio day at the Crashdown. And you love my dad’s chilorio.’

He wants to go. Badly. But he shakes his head. ‘Too much to catch up on. But here.’ He pulls out his wallet and throws some cash on the table. ‘Lunch is on me. And some of that chilorio to go, please.’

Liz sighs as she pockets the cash. ‘You need to get out more, Alex. Maria and I are your friends. And we’re concerned by how much you stay cooped up in this dusty old office. Plus, Michael’s hot.’

‘What’s that got to do with anything?’ He can feel his ears turning red. Thanks a higher power his hair is long enough now to mostly cover the offensive blush.

‘Nothing.’ But she’s giving him a very meaningful look.

Alex shakes his head aggressively at her. ‘No matchmaking, Liz. Do you hear me? Remember the last time Maria tried hooking up with that alien obsessed long-haul trucker and love me more than that.’

‘Sure thing, boss.’ She looks anything like it’s a sure thing.

Maria and Michael pop their heads through the doorway. ‘Ready? I have a mighty need for some melted cheese. And Michael’s never been to the Crashdown which is a travesty. You coming, Alex?’

She’s looking at him pointedly. So is Liz. So is Michael. The peer pressure almost gets him, but he chickens out at the last minute. ‘You guys go ahead. I’ll be here when you get back with my chilorio.’

Liz and Maria are clearly disappointed. And he swears Michael looks a little disappointed, too. An urgent need to run after them bubbles up in his chest briefly, but he swallows it down and refocuses on his work. The wink Michael gave Maria earlier replays through his mind. Now would be a really bad time to fall for a straight man. Not that there’s ever a good time to fall for a straight man.

Alex places a pencil on one side of his desk and watches it roll across the surface, slowly gaining speed. And then it falls, landing soundlessly on the carpeted floor.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alex and Michael are left alone in the office.

The next two weeks fly by without incident. Alex barely sees Michael, but notices how much better the office already looks. How many fewer things creak. His desk is still one millimeter off level. He often hears Maria, Liz, and Michael laughing outside his office. Catches Maria and Michael in the stairwell more than once whispering together about god only knows. Wonders when or if they are already seeing each other regularly outside of work. And he doesn’t mean for lunch at the Crashdown. If they are dating, he will file Michael’s return and release him from work immediately.

But he’s too scared to ask Maria.

Michael is always friendly in passing. Little waves, terrible accounting jokes he’s googled, a smile with a ‘hey’ attached. But Alex never stops to chat, never returns his friendliness in kind. He’s not mean; he’s just distant. And he never catches the looks of disappointment Michael shoots at his back every time he curtly mumbles a ‘hey’ without so much as a sideways glance.

Maria and Liz spend their days alternating between client work and eye rolling as they watch the two men begin a dance that only can end one way. They just hope that day comes before they’re all tucked away in retirement homes. But they have their doubts.

The third week presents Alex with a new problem. Maria and Liz are taking the week for a girl’s trip to Mexico. So, he’s left to fend for himself with no one but Michael for company. And he’s maybe kinda sorta a lot terrified. Knows he needs to be friendlier. Stop and chat. Ask him questions about himself. Normal things you do with employees. Not that Michael is a formal employee. He’s something else. Something else entirely.

At any point, Alex could file that return and be free. But he never does.

So, Monday morning comes whether he likes it or not. Michael is already hammering away, hanging some of the art that’s been collecting dust for over a year. Alex stops to appreciate Rosa’s paintings. Liz’s sister is next level genius and they are lucky to have some of her early work. She’s so well-known in art circles these days that Alex has had to expand his insurance policy because of those three paintings. Liz is super proud.

‘She’s good. Liz’s sister.’ Michael is talking around several nails in his mouth. Alex barely understands him.

‘Rosa’s always been an astonishing talent. And we’ve always been crazy jealous. Because she got out.’

Michael looks back at Alex’s wistful look. ‘Got out?’

‘Of Roswell. The rest of us got stuck.’ Their lock eyes for a brief moment and the temperature in the room skyrockets.

Michael drags his eyes up and down Alex’s body. Slow and with no shame. Turns back to his hammering. ‘You can be an accountant anywhere, Alex. Tax law exists outside of New Mexico. You didn’t get stuck; you decided to stay.’

Alex feels like he’s been sucker punched. Gets irrationally angry. Mostly because Michael is right. He chose to stay in this bigoted backwater town with nothing but sand and cowboy hats for miles. And it’s not like he can even blame love of family for his decision.

He turns towards his office. Michael watches him go.

A couple of hours go by uninterrupted. The shadows in his office grow shorter as the sun nears mid-sky. He’s working on billings when Michael knocks on his door. ‘Ready to level that seesaw you call a desk?’

Alex rolls his chair out of the way. Michael kneels down at the lopsided leg in question. He grabs something out of his toolbag and lifts the desk with an ease that confuses Alex. He’s not even using two hands. But the way Michael’s biceps flex beneath the weight is enough to distract him from the sheer impossibility of what Michael is doing.

Within seconds, the desk is perfectly level. Alex asks if he wants to run the pencil diagnostic, but Michael mutters a ‘nah’ and shrugs his shoulders.

‘You’re very cocky.’ Alex grabs a pencil and places it on the desk, anyway. It doesn’t budge.

‘No, I’m just very, very good. No point in lying about it. And I’m good at a lot of things, Alex.’ There can be no denying the heat in his voice or the innuendo in his words. Alex blushes down to his toes. His eyes are staring at his shoes, twitching back and forth willing himself to come up with some similarly flirty response. But Alex has never been good at flirting. And so, the moment passes.

Alex reminds himself that Michael flirts with everyone. That he’s always ready with a quick quip or a sideways smile. Leaning suggestively on Liz and Maria’s desks, laughing with all that light in his eyes. There’s nothing special about him. Nothing at all.

Michael has turned to leave, but he pauses in the doorway. Looks back over his shoulder. ‘Would you have dinner with me tonight?’

Alex stops breathing. There’s no way he heard that correctly. ‘What?’ His voice nothing but a whisper.

‘I just mean-,’ Michael’s voice to trails off and for the first time Alex thinks he may be nervous. ‘I just mean, you always stay so late. And I was going to swing by the Crashdown anyway. For Arturo’s enchiladas. So, I could get dinner to-go and come back.’

‘Why?’ One word questions the best he can articulate at the moment.

‘I don’t know. I thought maybe we could get to know each other better. Liz and Maria have told me a few things. But not much. I’m still new in town, trying to make this place a home or whatever. So.’ His thumbnail is scratching at a splinter in the doorframe. His eyes aren’t staying focused. He’s definitely nervous.

‘You’re new here? Then how did you know about me – that stupid parade?’

Michael shrugs. ‘My brother and sister have always lived here. Isobel was the one who organized the parade. She’s on that girl’s trip with Liz and Maria as we speak.’

‘Isobel Evan is your sister? What – how?’ Alex is trying to do the math in his head but coming up blank.

Michael smiles. ‘That’s a long story. But tell you what. You let me bring you dinner tonight and I’ll tell you anything you want to know.’

Alex’s brain tries to give him a million reasons to say no. But his heart leaps forward and Alex hears himself saying yes. The smile on Michael’s face widens and Alex swears he can see the cockiest man he knows blush. Because of him. And it’s like every dream he’s ever had has suddenly come true.

\------

Stay tuned next episode for Michael’s POV. And their first date! I mean, this must be a date right? RIGHT?


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alex and Michael's first date.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My hand slipped and this chapter got sad! I'm so sorry but it's only upwards from here! Alex just needs a hug. From Michael. It's coming. I promise, I promise, I promise. Also, Isobel and Maria at not related in this universe!!!!

The rest of the day goes by in a blur. Alex doesn’t get much work done, but he does spend an excessive amount of time online googling first date conversation topics. He doesn’t know why. He and Michael haven’t had too much trouble finding something to talk about so far, but he’s nervous and proper preparation always makes him feel better.

He hears Michael leave around 6 pm and spends the next several minutes spiraling. Trying to convince himself that this isn’t a date. That Michael has probably already forgotten about him and gone home. But his heart dares to believe. So, he stays put and waits. Only briefly calling his neighbor and asking her to feed his dog.

Thirty minutes later, Michael returns and Alex finally breathes again. He hurriedly throws off his suit jacket and undoes the top two buttons of his shirt, hoping to appear more casual. He also pretends to still be working so Michael won’t know that he’s spent the past several hours obsessing over their maybe date. 

Michael knocks on his door but doesn’t wait before he enters. His hands and his mouth are filled with takeout bags. ‘Who’s supposed to eat all that?’ Alex figures there’s enough food to feed at least two small armies.

‘Liz’s dad made me take extra for the both of us. Says we’re too skinny.’ He hands Alex his share and collapses in a chair across the desk. ‘Personally, I think we both look hot.’ He winks at Alex and dives into his food.

Alex does the same, more so to hide his blush than for the food. They spend the next 15 minutes eating in silence. Michael inhaling everything and Alex barely finishing half his burger. 

‘So, Isobel is your sister?’ Alex decides to be brave and start the conversation.

‘Sort of. It’s complicated. All three of us were found abandoned on a highway when we were seven. We’ve never known who our real parents are. Max and Isobel got adopted by Ann and David Evans. I got put in the system. We aren’t biological siblings though.’ He licks his fingers and leans back in his chair.

Alex frowns. ‘Why did you end up in the system?’

‘Don’t know. Guess I just looked dangerous.’ Michael smirks, but Alex sees a vastly different emotion flicker in his eyes. ‘So, what about you? Did you get a happy childhood?’

He thinks about lying. About skirting the truth. ‘My mom left when I was seven. My dad was an abusive homophobic dick.’

‘Well, fuck that guy.’ Michael looks intently at him and then smiles. 

Alex smiles back. ‘My brother killed him three years ago. Shot him in the heart. Self-dense. My dad had built a bomb.’

Michael chokes on his soda. ‘You can’t be serious.’ But Alex doesn’t respond, just watches the color drain from Michael’s face. Worries he’s going to walk out the door and never come back. ‘Holy fuck.’

‘Sorry. That was probably a bit much for a fir –‘

He stops himself. Looks down at his hands.

‘A first date? Yeah, maybe. But I’m glad you told me.’ Michael tosses his empty bags into the garbage can behind him. ‘So, what made you stay in Roswell? Can’t be all the happy family memories.’

He has no answer for this question. Not one that makes sense anyway. ‘Honestly? I don’t know. Maybe fear. Once upon a time I wanted to make music. Be a songwriter. Then I joined the Air Force and learned to be afraid of taking unnecessary chances.’

‘Because of your leg?’ 

Alex rubs absentmindedly at his right knee. ‘My leg, my dad, the state of the world. Take your pick.’

‘I get that, Alex. I do. But I think it’s time to start taking chances again.’ He scoots his chair around the desk and as close to Alex as he can get. Swats Alex’s hands out of the way and begins to massage at the sore muscles in his lower thigh. ‘Is this okay?’

Every single nerve ending in Alex’s body is suddenly on fire. He swallows and nods. Michael smiles and moves an inch further up his leg. ‘I’m a trained masseur, you know. Just one of my many specialties.’

‘Are you dating Maria?’ He hadn’t meant to just blurt that out, but he needs a distraction from Michael’s hands.

Michael snorts and keeps working at Alex’s tense muscles. ‘Is that what you thought? I kept wondering about all those nasty little looks.’

Alex’s eyes go wide. Feels his cheeks flame, again. ‘I’m so sorry – I just –‘

But Michael chuckles and shakes his head. ‘It’s fine. And no, I’m not dating Maria. She’s much more interested in Isobel. So, I’ve been playing matchmaker.’

‘Oh.’ He lets the relief stay in his voice as their eyes lock together. Lets himself enjoy the way Michael’s fingers know exactly how to touch him. Lets himself lean ever so slightly forward. Growing drunk on the tension between them.

He hasn’t kissed anyone in over a year. Wonders if he even remembers how. But Michael’s lips are so close now and time is running out. He watches as Michael closes his eyes and something in Alex snaps. Snaps and breaks and crumbles to the floor.

‘I’m sorry, Michael.’ He scrambles to gather his laptop and his workbag. Nearly falling out of his chair in a desperate race to remove himself from this situation. 

‘Did I do something wrong?’ Michael is helping him pack his bag now and Alex feels like a monster.

‘No.’ Alex takes a deep breath and several steps away from Michael. ‘You didn’t do anything wrong. I’m just…I don’t think I’m ready to take chances yet. I’m really sorry. You deserved better than whatever this was.’

And Alex flees. Like he always does. Michael watches him go.

*

Hours later, Alex opens his laptop, attaches Michael’s tax return to an email, and sends him the completed file. He lies back in his bed and watches his ceiling fan spin round and round. Trix climbs into bed beside him and places her head on his hip. And Alex begins to cry.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Michael pays Alex a visit.

Michael wakes up before the sun on Saturday morning. He’s thinking about heading to the gym early when he picks up his phone and notices a new email from Alex. It’s his completed tax return. And one single sentence of text.

_Thanks for all your help these past few weeks._

He’s been dismissed. And he hates it. The gym will have to wait.

Arturo greets him warmly when he enters the Crashdown. He’s one of only three patrons. Roswell likes to sleep-in on the weekends. Michael orders half a dozen donuts and two coffees. Speaks with Arturo about a new business arrangement and leaves.

He doesn’t get nervous until he pulls into Alex’s driveway. There’s a really big possibility that the door is about to be slammed in his face. But Alex is worth the chance. Since moving to Roswell, he hasn’t exactly made many friends. Spending most of his time alone or with his siblings. Until the day he walked into Cosmic Clowns, CPA. And everything seemed to click into place.

Alex’s house is quaint. Small and rust colored. A ristra hanging near the front door. Michael immediately feels like he’s home but decides not to look too closely at that. He hasn’t even been invited in yet.

He knocks. Waits. Nothing. Knocks again. More nothing. He begins to get nervous, bouncing on the balls of his feet. But then the door opens, and Alex is in front of him. Shirtless and still dripping from his shower. Michael just stands there gaping at him.

‘Michael? What are you doing here?’ But Michael doesn’t hear him because he’s too busy watching a single teardrop of water inch closer to Alex’s left nipple. The fact that he can’t lean in and lick the drop away with his tongue is a hate crime.

‘Michael?’ Alex tries again, clearly concerned. He looks down at the box of donuts and coffee in Michael’s hands. Even more confused.

‘Can I come in? I brought breakfast.’ He smiles and drags his eyes back up to Alex’s face. Well, his lips. But it’s a start.

Alex opens the door wider, but Michael can sense his hesitancy. He steps inside and follows Alex to his kitchen.

‘Let me just go get a shirt.’ 

Michael grins, brazenly running his eyes over Alex’s nakedness. Again. ‘Really, really not necessary but I guess I can’t stop you.’ He enjoys the way Alex’s blush spreads down his neck, settling in his chest. The way his nipples flush and harden.

‘I’ll just be a minute.’ 

When Alex returns, Michael has made himself at home. Legs kicked up in a chair, hat in the middle of the table, and half a strawberry glazed donut already devoured. There’s powdered sugar on his nose and all down his shirt.

‘Why are you here, Michael? I sent your return. So.’ Alex takes a seat across from him. 

Michael slides his coffee over to him. ‘I’m here about last night. To apologize.’

But Alex is aggressively shaking his head. ‘No. You didn’t do anything. Please don’t be sorry.’

‘Well, I definitely had my hands too far up your thigh for a first date.’ He smirks and takes another bite of donut. He’s also rewarded with another blush. Heat flares in his belly. Michael’s not sure he’s ever been this attracted to someone before.

‘I liked your hands. A lot.’ Alex fingers the cardboard sleeve around his coffee. ‘And I wanted to kiss you. But, _trust me_ , you didn’t want to kiss me.’

Michael hates the way his shoulders sag with defeat and sadness. ‘I very definitely wanted to kiss you, Alex. Have wanted to since we met that first night. I think you’re the prettiest boy I’ve seen.’

‘I’m a mess, Michael. And you’re so put together. So confident and happy all the time. My mess would ruin that.’ His hands fall to his lap as he takes a big, shuddering breath.

The room goes silent for a beat until Michael stands and moves around to Alex’s side of the table, sitting in the chair next to him. He tentatively places his hand on Alex’s lower back, just to ground him a little. ‘That’s a bunch of cowboy swagger bullshit. I have plenty of my own issues. We all do.’

‘Yeah, like what?’ 

‘Like, I drink too much and then spend my nights angry at nothing. I’m a genius who does handiwork for a living. And when I love someone,’ he pauses to sweetly push Alex’s hair behind his ear, ‘I spend more time pushing them away than pulling them close. But I’m working on that one.’

Michael is unsure if he’s implying that he’s already in love with Alex. Thinks maybe he is – at least a touch. That scares him because he’s never pitched himself headfirst off a cliff for someone this quickly.

‘Listen, Alex. If you tell me to leave, I will go and never bother you again. But I don’t want that. I like you. Even if you are a mess, you’re a goddamn beautiful mess. And maybe you can be _my_ mess until we work out all the kinks together. If you want.’ Michael rubs his hand across Alex’s back on last time and then pushes away to give him some space.

For a long time, Alex doesn’t say anything. He just hangs his head and worries at his fingernails. And when he finally does speak, Michael can barely hear him, has to nudge him so he’ll talk louder.

‘I do want that. But I need to go slow. Like, maybe too slow.’ Michael knows Alex expects that to scare him off. But instead, he stands up, stretching and heading back around the table. ‘I can do slow. And I’ll always ask before I touch you. I promise.’

Alex nods, gives him a small smile. ‘I hope you have another job to keep you busy. I finished your return and maybe it’s best you aren’t my sort of employee.’

‘Don’t worry about me. Already got a gig helping Arturo freshen up the Crashdown.’ He grabs his hat and walks back to Alex. ‘I’m going to give you back your Saturday now. Head to the gym.’ He leans down, testing Alex’s personal space. When he doesn’t move away, he asks, ‘Can I kiss you goodbye – on the forehead?’ His voice is low and silky smooth. 

Alex feels the request all the way down to his toes. ‘Yes.’ 

So, Michael softly presses his lips to the top of Alex’s forehead, the clean smell of his shampoo filling his senses. ‘And can I kiss you goodbye right here.’ He strokes the small spot between Alex’s eyes.

Alex swallows. Nods.

Michael replaces his finger with his mouth, another gentle lip graze. He thumbs along Alex’s bottom lip, considers asking but decides the wait will be sweeter. ‘Goodbye, Alex.’

Outside in his truck, Michael starts the engine and heads down the highway. He finds an isolated spot – the morning still early – and pulls over. He knows he’s in trouble. Knows that what he feels for Alex has come too quickly. The way he’s already feeling the ache of home in his chest at the thought of staying in Roswell. Too much, too much, too much. And then there’s the ache in his cock – after only a couple of light kisses and barely there touches. It’s too fucking much.

But he can’t stop himself from unzipping and jerking himself into his fist. Remembering Alex wet and dripping. Alex blushing with those perfect blood-flushed nipples. Alex warm and soft beneath his lips. And it doesn’t take long before his orgasm is spilling into the desert morning, the rising sun the only witness.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The tension builds.

The following Monday Alex is back in the office and things are much quieter. Liz and Maria have returned, but they are both so busy catching up on client emails that Alex doesn’t hear a peep from either of them.

He misses Michael. 

Misses the way he’d wink hello. Or the incessant pounding of his hammer. The way he made Liz and Maria laugh so easily. The way a fresh, perfectly poured cup of coffee always appeared on his desk each morning.

So, Alex takes a lunch. For the first time in weeks. He ignores Liz’s knowing giggles as he walks past her desk. Ignores the way she gleefully shouts, ‘Tell Mikey we said hello!’ 

The noon sky is bright and crystal clear. As Alex rounds the corner of the Crashdown, he spots Michael up a ladder. He’s in nothing but a black tank top, arms flexing as he stretches across to paint the store’s wood paneling. Alex decides to watch a while – enjoying the view. It’s something he realizes he gets to do now – ogle his maybe one day boyfriend without a hint of fear or shame.

‘Would you mind handing me the roller?’ Michael winks down at him, pointing at the small roller resting against an unopened paint can.

Alex blushes, but reaches up to pass the roller to him. Michael lets his fingertips accidentally tiptoe lightly across Alex’s wrist before grabbing the roller and returning to his task, smiling smugly to himself.

Just that slight contact sends Alex’s head spinning, toes curling. He undoes the top button on his dress shirt and swallows. ‘How’s the new gig going?’

‘Can’t complain. Arturo’s a pretty cool boss. Although, not as hot as the last one. Less distracting, though.’ He finishes coating all the wood he can reach and climbs down to reset the ladder. He shifts into Alex’s space suddenly. Pauses. Licks his bottom lip. ‘Can I kiss you hello? On the cheek?’

Alex inhales sharply and nods. Michael presses his palm into Alex’s right cheek and his lips into the other, lingering there for so long Alex’s knees start to feel like putty.

‘So, this must be the famous Alex Manes.’ 

Alex jumps back at the sound of his name. A tall, lithe blonde has joined them, sunglasses perched on top of her head and arms crossed over her chest. ‘I’m Isobel – the sister. Don’t know if you remember me from high school or not.’ 

She extends her hand and Alex shakes it, switching into business mode. ‘You were hard to miss.’

Michael chuckles and Isobel grins, shoving her brother playfully. ‘I’ll take that as a compliment. Have you asked him yet, Michael?’

‘Asked me what?’ Alex takes a couple of steps back, needing the space. He hadn’t been prepared to meet or be reintroduced to any of Michael’s family so soon.

‘Oh, ah, we were thinking about going to the Chaves County fair tomorrow night. Thought you might like to go. Isobel is taking Maria.’ Isobel smiles fondly at the mention of Maria, eyes going a bit dreamy.

Michael bumps Alex with this shoulder. ‘You, me, and the top of the Ferris wheel seems like a pretty good night. Yeah?’

Alex looks back and forth between the siblings, both of them grinning at him and expecting him to say yes. So, he does. ‘I’d love to.’

‘Yay!’ Isobel claps her hands and leans over to kiss Michael on the cheek. ‘I’m off to a charity luncheon, but I’ll see you tonight. Nice seeing you again, Alex. Looking forward to tomorrow.’ With a wave and a wink, she’s gone.

‘Wow, she’s –‘

‘Intense. I know. But I love her. And she’s been through a lot.’ His eyes darken briefly, and Alex recalls the mysterious death of her husband, Noah Bracken, a couple of years back. ‘You got kind of bombarded there. So, if you don’t want to go to the fair just let me know.’

‘I do want to go. Really. I need to make sure my neighbor can dog-sit, though. So, I’ll call you later tonight to confirm.’ Michael smiles at him and nods. And Alex wants to kiss him. On the mouth this time. But some rope around his heart keeps tugging at him – keeping him from reaching out for the things that he wants. And so, he gestures towards the diner instead. ‘I better go get lunch before my hour’s up. Liz and Maria will send out a search party if I’m late.’

‘Okay. I’m glad you crawled out of that dank, dark office for once. You look good with the sun on your skin.’ He takes two steps closer to Alex, hovering an inch from his mouth. ‘Tomorrow night I want to kiss you properly. You can choose the time and place – on top of the Ferris wheel, secretly in a dark corner of the funhouse, wide open in the middle of the fairway. Anywhere. So, while you’re figuring out your dog-sitting situation, maybe give that some thought, too.’

Alex can feel the blood rush across his cheeks as his face heats up. Michael pretends not to notice the effect he has and rebuttons Alex’s top button. He places his palms just over the top of Alex’s chest, eyes asking for permission. Alex feels himself nod, swaying towards Michael’s hands. The touch is gentle and slow, smoothing out the wrinkles in Alex’s shirt. But Michael lets his thumbs brush firmly against Alex’s nipples once and then twice, loving the tiny little exhale of breath Alex can’t hide.

And then Michael is gone. Half-way up the ladder before Alex even realizes. He stands there lost in a daze before realizing how silly he must look. Shaking his head, he waves goodbye to Michael and dips inside the Crashdown to order lunch. Flashes of carnival lights dancing in his eyes.

\--

When he gets home, Alex heads straight for Natalie’s house. They exchange polite small talk and she agrees to watch Trix the next night. So later that night, he sits on his sofa, Trix’s head in his lap, and pulls out his phone. Dials Michael’s number.

‘Hey, sailor.’ His sounds sleepy.

Alex snorts. ‘I’m no sailor. Did I wake you up?’

‘Yeah, but I’m not complaining. Get a dog-sitter?’ He yawns into the speaker, humming in contentment and Alex wants nothing more than to drive to Michael’s house and crawl into bed beside him.

‘Yes. So, you can pick me up directly from work if you want. Maybe get dinner first – just the two of us?’ He holds his breath waiting for Michael’s answer.

‘Alexander Manes, are you asking me on a date?’ 

‘A do-over, actually. After I ruined our last dinner.’ He takes a deep breath and musters all the courage he possesses. ‘And I’d like you to kiss me goodnight. At my front door.’

He can hear the smile in Michael’s voice. ‘Delayed gratification. I like it. But you didn’t ruin our dinner. I loved our dinner.’

‘Well, I still think I can do better. So. I’ll see you tomorrow night.’ Alex can’t keep the grin out of his voice either. Or the butterflies out of his stomach. 

‘Sweet dreams, Alex.’ They hang up the phone and neither one gets a wink of sleep that night.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alex and Michael head to the fair.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really hope this at least approaches everyone's level of expectation - lol.

Liz picks Alex up the next morning so that he can leave his car at home. She keeps looking over and grinning at him the whole way to work. Once even reaching over to squeeze his knee in excitement.

‘I’m so happy for you and Maria. Even if you are both dating my ex’s siblings.’ Alex laughs. ‘What kind of friends let me date a cop? Anyway, keep Max Evans far away from me, Alex. Do you understand?’ She pulls into the parking lot and cuts the engine. ‘I never want to see that vanilla frat boy face again.’

Inside Maria is already clacking away at her keyboard. ‘I’m here early so I can leave early. Getting my nails done for tonight.’ She wiggles her fingers at them, then frowns. ‘Why the crutches, Alex? Feeling okay?’

‘Oh, yeah. The prosthetic is down in Liz’s car. I don’t want to wear out my leg before tonight. So, crutches it is.’ Alex leaves the two of them to their happy laughter and shuts his office door for a little peace and quiet. He’s nervous – more nervous than he’s willing to admit.

But he doesn’t have much time to wallow in his anxiety before a client calls him and occupies his mind for the next two hours. And then another client and another until four o’clock rolls around and Liz is bringing him his prosthetic. She wishes him luck and leaves – Maria already long gone.

Alex changes in his office, walking into his small bathroom to give himself a once over in the mirror. The outfit is simple – his favorite pair of jeans with the knees worn out and a thin, black sweater in case the night grows chilly. He tries to swoosh his hands through his hair enough to make it look fluffy and freshly tousled. To complete the look, he does something he hasn’t done in a very long time. Reaching into his pocket, he pulls out a tiny gold hoop and pushes it through his still pierced ear.

Michael texts that he’s downstairs. Alex takes several deep breaths and stuffs his wallet into his back pocket. He quickly puts on extra deodorant and heads out of his office.

He swings the building doors open and finds Michael leaning against the passenger side of his truck, one leg kicked back onto the fender and grinning at the sight of him. Alex grins too. And they stand like that for an excessive amount of time – beaming at each other like clowns. Clowns who are beyond a shadow of a doubt falling head over heels, ass backwards in love.

‘Well, you look good enough to eat.’ Michael stalks towards him, eyes focusing on the earring in his left ear. And then over to his mouth. Alex blushes but does his own once over. At Michael’s tight jeans, the copper belt buckle – his white tank top covered by an unbuttoned black shirt with roses stitched into the chest pockets. And the way he smells so, so good.

Michael asks for a hug by raising his arms and crooking all his fingers at Alex. He complies, nearly tripping over himself to wrap his arms around Michael. ‘I’m really excited about tonight.’ He pulls back and smiles softly. ‘Thank you for inviting me.’

‘Trust me, Alex. The pleasure is all mine.’ He opens the truck’s door for Alex to slide inside. And then, they are off into the night.

Dinner goes really well. They share all the details of their troubled childhoods, the dreams they dreamed as kids, and Michael tells several obscene stories about his first terrible sexual experiences. Mostly, they laugh. Laugh and eat and enjoy each other’s company. Even their silences, comfortable and relaxed.

When they pull into the fairgrounds, Maria and Isobel are already waiting for them. They exchange hellos and Isobel grabs her girlfriend’s hand – winks at Michael and Alex – and starts walking backwards. ‘We’ll leave you boys alone. Give you two some personal time. Meet you at the Ferris wheel in an hour.’

‘So, what do you want to do first?’ They pay the entrance free and get their hands stamped. ‘I think the funhouse has great potential. But the Gravitron is always a hit – or I could win you a giant purple teddy bear.’

Alex laughs and shakes his head. ‘No teddy bears. But the funhouse sounds like a plan.’ He gathers his courage and holds his hand out to Michael. He likes the way making the first move feels. And when Michael threads their fingers together, he decides that whatever risks await him within this relationship – the rewards are bound to be so, so good. And that’s a chance he’s finally ready to take.

They get quite a workout – walking up and down the fairway stopping at each and every attraction. Forty-five minutes pass in a blur as they head towards the cotton candy stand. Michael declaring that no carnival experience is ever complete without the proper carnival diet.

Michael gets in line behind a couple of other people. But Alex hangs back, wanting to spend a moment taking in his surroundings. He’s felt like such a recluse these past several months, and he’s not sure why. But being outside in the crisp spring air has him feeling energized and full of life.

The fairway stretches before him for what feels like miles, disappearing into the dark horizon. Flashing lights blink all around, the heat from the bulbs creating a smokey, surreal atmosphere that transports him to some other time and place. The laughter of small children and the soothing voices of their parents fill his ears alongside the eerie funhouse music echoing behind him. The whoosh of mechanical rides splitting the air and the whirl of the crowd crushing in close disorients him in a delightful way. He smells roasting turkey legs drenched in tangy barbecue sauce and buttery popcorn. Salt-crusted pretzels and the sickly-sweet scent of lollipops and caramel coated apples. A gentle breeze rustles the tiny hairs on the nape of his neck, sending little shivers dancing up and down his spine.

All his senses are lit on fire. Exploding with the carnival’s chaos – the overwhelming cacophony of teenagers gossiping, flags whipping in the air, hot dogs roasting on rotating oven racks, and the syrupy hint of strawberry slushies on the tip of his tongue. The world tilts, slanting into a spin. Alex closes his eyes and lets himself go. Allowing the thrill of the fair to sweep him away.

And when he reopens his eyes, Michael is directly in front of him. Close enough that his body heat creeps slowly into Alex’s skin. The evening’s sights and sounds still so oppressive and pulsating, pushing him forward with no hesitation because all his fear and worry and anxiety is buried beneath the too much of it all. And before he can even breathe, his arms are hugging tight around Michael’s neck – their bodies touching at every point from chest to hips to thighs and tangled feet.

And their lips – their mouths – their teeth – their tongues.

Pressing together as Alex licks Michael’s pink candy-dusted lips asking – no _begging_ – for entry. And Michael complies – going pliant beneath Alex’s insistent tongue. Abandoning his cotton candy to the fairway detritus of those who came before. Michael’s hands don’t know where to begin, starting on the slight curve of Alex’s hips and sliding upwards across his firm chest and taut nipples – landing eventually in his thick, soft hair. And the first time the tip of Alex’s tongue glances against his own, Michael involuntarily bucks his hips and moans into Alex’s mouth.

They are still standing in front of the vendor stall and patrons are beginning to complain. Someone pushes at Michael’s shoulder roughly, yelling at them to get a room. Too love-drunk to break away, Michael tightens his arms around Alex’s waist and lifts him – blindly walking them backwards to the side of the makeshift shed housing the food stall. When his shoulders slap against the fake paneled wood, he spins them around and presses Alex against the wall. Never once disconnecting their mouths. He shoves his knee aggressively between Alex’s thighs, loving the vulgar way Alex starts to pump his already hard cock against his own denim-clad thigh.

But Alex – Alex is lost in a dream. Utterly undone and trembling with pleasure. He wants nothing more than to strip them down here and now. Let Michael fuck into him while everyone watches them rut against this shaky unstable shack. It’s been so long – too long since someone has touched him like this. Maybe no one has ever touched him like this. And he never wants him to stop. Michael’s hands reach down, palming his ass and Alex sucks at his pulse point hard enough to leave a mark. The carnival slowly begins to fade away. The noises hushed by the beating of his own heart, the sights dimmed under his heavy-lidded eyes, the smells drowned out by the clean scent of Michael’s shampoo. And the tastes – _my god_ , the tastes – melted away on Michael’s bruising lips and filthy, wet tongue.

Take all that carnival nonsense away and what’s left is them – just Michael and Alex. And the best kiss of both their lives.


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Michael and Isobel discuss Michael's next step.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is mostly a transition chapter. Next chapter promises to be more exciting!

Michael drops Alex off at his house. Kisses him breathless against his front door, pulling away just before they are unable to stop. Says goodnight and heads out to Foster’s Ranch to spend the rest of the night beneath the stars. Eyes scanning the sky for home, heart whispering that home spent all night kissing his lips sweet and swollen.

As the stars wink down at him, he replays the evening over and over in his head. Wondering at the grin that won’t leave his face – cheek muscles tight and sore with joy. The way his heartbeat hasn’t slowed in hours. The way every miserable day of his life to this point suddenly feels worth something. If he were stupid, he’d call that love.

He falls asleep sometime near sunrise. Deep and dreamless. 

A car horn wakes him a few hours later. Old man Foster waves at him from his own beat up truck, turning onto the highway and disappearing. Michael squints into the morning sun and pulls out his phone.

‘Good morning, Michael. Sleep well?’ Isobel asks, voice laced with her own happiness.

That grin finds the corners of his mouth again and he laughs when he hears Maria in the background. ‘Not as good as you.’ He hops over the tailgate and climbs into the cab. ‘Have lunch with me today. Crashdown – noon.’ He cranks his engine and glances at the dashboard clock. ‘And Maria is very, very late for work. She should probably bring her boss an apology donut.’

‘Well, a little birdy named Liz Ortecho told me that the boss man himself was thirty minutes late this morning. Guess none of us did much sleeping last night. See you at noon.’ She giggles and hangs up.

Michael considers calling Alex but decides not to distract him any further. He does send a kissy face emoji along with a good morning. And yes, he almost gags at himself.

What remains of the morning flies by. Michael helps Arturo replace the menu sign behind the counter, spending an inappropriate amount of time texting back and forth with Alex. 

Right on time, Isobel glides through the double doors and motions him towards a booth in the back. She removes her sunglasses, eyes tired but shining. ‘All the gory details, Michael. Leave nothing out.’

‘Nothing to share. I was a perfect gentleman unlike yourself. Dropped him off at his door and said goodnight. Some of us have manners.’

‘Oh, fuck your manners.’ She pours the tiniest splash of cream into her coffee. ‘I got laid.’ She smiles wickedly as she sips at her mug. 

Michael smirks and throws a sugar packet at her face. It splashes into her coffee and she slaps at his arm in protest. ‘Alex and I are taking our time. We’ll get there. And when we do, I’m not telling you jack shit.’

Isobel gives him an appraising look, then quirks an eyebrow. ‘You’re different with him. Softer.’ She crosses her arms over her chest, narrowing her eyes. ‘You love him.’

He doesn’t say anything. Just holds her gaze which is all the answer she needs.

‘I’m going to tell him, Isobel.’ Michael’s voice has turned serious. His eyes clouded with a new worry. ‘I have to.’

She bites her lip and her forehead creases. Takes a long time to respond as she drinks her coffee. ‘You can’t, Michael. We all promised.’ She flicks her eyes at him accusingly. ‘You’ve sat across from me and given this same speech. With every single relationship I’ve ever been in.’

She’s right. He’s always been annoyingly self-righteous when it comes to keeping their secret. And now he realizes that’s because he’s never been in love before. Which makes him a colossal asshole and the worst kind of hypocrite. Both Isobel and Max have ruined relationships keeping their secret. He doesn’t get to be any different.

And yet.

‘I’m going to tell him. Tonight. About me only. Your secret will be safe.’ He glances out the window, avoiding her gaze.

‘Michael,’ she hisses, leaning across the table. ‘He knows we were all found together – _you_ told him. He’s not an idiot.’

He leans back at her, crowding into her space. ‘He’d never hurt us. And you’re right. I do love him, Isobel. And I’ve never loved anyone. Ever. You and Max have always had each other. Please don’t take this from me.’

She scoffs. ‘You have us, Michael. You’ve always had us.’

But he shakes his head. ‘Max is your person. Isn’t that what you’re always saying?’ Anger begins to seep into his words. ‘That twin bond you two have? I don’t fucking have that with either of you. But maybe I could have something close. With Alex.’

Isobel knows she can’t argue with him. She’s always known how lonely Michael’s life has been. Even with the three of them finally together the shape of that loneliness still lingers, permanently lining his eyes with sadness. ‘Are you going to tell Max?’

‘I was hoping you’d help me with that.’

She groans. ‘Of course. This is why you wanted to have lunch.’

‘Please, Iz? Max and I would just end up coming to blows with you having to intervene anyway. This way we skip the violence.’ He puts his hand on hers and squeezes. 

‘Fine. But Max is going to have his say, Michael. You know that.’ Isobel rolls her eyes. ‘Can we eat now?’ 

Michael smiles and waves towards Arturo.

*

Later that night, he heads back to his trailer to shower. Alex is cooking him dinner and he doesn’t want to be late. He’s spent all day muttering to himself – practicing the very difficult conversation ahead of him. Besides Max and Isobel, no one’s ever known the truth about him – about them. It’s a conversation none of them ever thought they’d have. So, the words are hard to find. Tricky and twisted up in his tongue. 

How do you tell someone that you’re an alien from another planet? And that you have superpowers? It’s beyond absurd.

How will Alex react? The best-case scenario he allows himself to imagine is Alex being stunned speechless – never talking to him again. The worst case is, well, much worse.

Because there’s no way he just accepts it. No fucking way. 

The drive to Alex’s house goes by way too quickly. And suddenly, he’s knocking on the door and the right words are still beyond him. A slow build up seems ideal. Perhaps on a full stomach the reveal will hit easier. Once they are happy and cuddled together on the couch. Maybe. Maybe, maybe, maybe. 

But all that goes out the window when Alex opens the front door and Michael’s nerves get the best of him. He opens his mouth to say hello but what comes out instead is, ‘I have a secret. And you need to sit down.’


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Michael confesses his secret and Alex reveals a secret of his own.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Things start to get sexual towards the very end.

Before Michael can speak another word, a giant barking blue-gray blur tackles him at the knees. Next thing he knows, he’s being given a tongue bath. 

‘Trix, no.’ Alex pulls her away from Michael. ‘Sorry, she’s normally super calm around new people.’

Michael reaches out to scratch behind her ears. ‘It’s okay. I’ll take it as a compliment. Honestly, I was beginning to think she didn’t exist as anything more than a convenient excuse to get out of social activities.’ He smirks at Alex and wipes the dirt from his jeans. ‘Glad she’s not imaginary.’

‘She’s a comfort dog - therapy dog, technically. Got her after I lost the leg.’ He walks Trix back inside and motions at Michael to follow. 

Alex let’s Trix out back and turns to him. ‘So, you have a secret?’ All Alex’s insecurities come flooding back to him in a warm flush, and he knows this cannot end well for him. The high he felt the night before crashes in around him. Each breath suffocating him until he has to pull at the collar of his t-shirt for air. 

Michael scratches at the back of his neck and points to Alex’s couch. ‘Please sit down. This is going to be hard for me. And for you.’

Alex takes two steps further away from him, frowning deeply. ‘That’s okay. And you don’t have to make some noble speech or whatever. I get it. It’s fine.’

‘Get what?’ Michael asks, confused. ‘You can’t possibly know what I’m about to say.’

‘I messed up last night, right? I was too desperate? Or you finally figured out that you’re better off without me. The needy, traumatized former soldier. Whatever - it’s fine. Sorry for bothering you.’ He stares down at his sneakers and shrugs his shoulders pretending that he doesn’t care. But he’s never cared about anything more.

‘Baby, no.’ Michael moves to him, arms outstretched. But Alex feels himself flinch and watches Michael stop. ‘That’s not my secret. Not at all.’ He takes one step closer. ‘The opposite really. I want this to work between us. Maybe forever. And that means you need to know something about me. Something I’ve never told anyone before.’

Alex deeply wants to believe him, even as his heart is screaming at him to run. The only thing that stops him is the soft way that Michael had said baby. Never in his life has anyone ever called him that. It melts right through all his defenses.

‘I’m going to sit down.’ He moves past Michael, still keeping several feet between them. Settling on his sofa, he swallows hard and sets his hands on his knees, feeling sweat start to roll down his back. 

Michael paces back and forth on the other side of his coffee table. He pauses several times only to start again. Alex’s nerves begin to fray. Eventually, Michael stops and faces him. ‘I don’t know how to say it. I’ve been trying to find the right words all day. And I can’t. So, I’ll show you instead.’

Suddenly, everything on the coffee table begins to float into the air - magazines, books, coasters, remotes. Everything. Alex gasps and shifts further back into his sofa, staring at Michael utterly and completely stunned. ‘What the fuck?’

Releasing his concentration, the floating objects fall back onto the table and Michael sighs. ‘Surprise! I may or may not be from this planet.’

All Alex can do is blink at him. And then, a distant, put-away memory leaps to the surface. He furrows his brow and looks at Michael curiously. Scanning his body for any signs of otherness. Finding exactly none. But his dad’s ramblings are now playing on repeat in his head. ‘The 1947 crash - my dad always went on and on about aliens being real and dangerous. I assumed it was the ramblings of a drunk, obsessed mad man.’ He stands up off the sofa and begins his own pacing. ‘When he died, my brothers and I found all these files - something called Project Shepherd. There were photos of bodies with handprints burned on their skin. Was that you?’

Michael winces at the question. ‘You think I’d hurt someone?’

‘No, never. I’m just trying to make sense of things - sorry. And I don’t handle things super well when I feel overwhelmed.’ He decides to take a chance and walks directly to Michael, placing his hands on his chest. The touch relaxes them both instantly, tension draining from their shoulders. Allowing himself a small moment of boldness, Alex pushes up on his left foot and kisses Michael. Soft and sweet - a reassurance that he trusts Michael completely no matter where he may have been born. It surprises both of them.

‘What was that for?’ Michael pulls away, big grin on his face. ‘Not that I’m complaining. It’s just not the reaction I expected from telling someone the truth after being afraid for so long.’

Alex shrugs and kisses him again. ‘Never kissed an alien before.’ He laughs. ‘Well, never knowingly kissed an alien before. Is that why you’re so warm?’

Michael nods. ‘We’re not that different, really. A little hotter and with a touch of magic. You’re taking this really well. Like maybe too well.’

It’s true. He believes Michael without question and feels no different towards him whatsoever. ‘Maybe I just need a little magic in my life.’ He blinks back a tear and presses his forehead into Michael’s. ‘I’ll yell and scream if you want me to, though.’

‘No, I like this version better.’ They wrap their arms around each other and stand pressed together for a long time. Swaying to the rhythm of their heartbeats. ‘Hey, do you still have those files? I’d love to see them.’

‘Yeah. They’re in my brother’s attic. I can get them this weekend. He lives on a nearby rez. You can come with me if you want?’ 

‘I very much want.’ Taking his hand, Michael walks him back around the coffee table and pushes him lightly onto the sofa. Alex laughs and raises an eyebrow. ‘What’s this about?’

‘There’s something I want to show you.’ He kneels between Alex’s knees and spreads them further apart. Runs his hands up the inside of his thighs, never once breaking eye contact. 

Alex squirms and grabs his wrists. ‘Show me? You’re just full of revelations today.’

Michael licks his lips and lets the sex that has existed between them since the first time they met seep into his voice. ‘This time the revelation will be about you. About the way I see you. About the way you make me feel. And about the ways I want you to see and feel about yourself.’

Every inch of Alex’s skin begins to flame and vibrate with want. But there’s fear too - buried beneath. And not far enough beneath to ignore. He drags his eyes from Michael’s and swallows. ‘I haven’t done this in a long time.’

‘I know, baby, but look at me.’ Michael reaches a hand up to his cheek and Alex looks back down at him. ‘I’m pretty sure I’m at least half-way in love with you. Maybe way past half-way. And I’d really, really like to show you.’ He smiles softly. ‘But no pressure. I’ll wait forever if you ask me to.’

There is nothing Alex wants more than to say yes. He wanted to say yes the moment Michael walked into his office. The fear in his heart has nothing to do with Michael and everything to do with the many and various hurts of his past. Things he has yet to share with Michael.

He imagines himself saying no. Letting Michael leave. Trying to sleep knowing what might have been. And the way his heart aches quashes his fears. At least for the moment. He returns Michael’s smile. ‘Show me.’

‘Are you absolutely sure, Alex? If there’s even a shred of doubt, you tell me right now.’ 

Alex’s smile grows into a grin. He leans down and whispers in Michael’s ear. ‘I’ve been known to come from nothing more than really good nipple play.’ He sits back and enjoys the way Michael’s eyes blow wide. 

Courage swelling, Alex winks. ‘I have a few secrets of my own.’


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Michael and Alex are ready to spend the rest of their lives together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Cosmic Clowns has come to its inevitable conclusion! Thank you so much to everyone who has followed this very self-indulgent story where I made Alex a CPA like me. There's nothing flashy happening in these chapters, but I've loved every single second of writing the quietness of their love. A slice of life story where an alien falls for a CPA. WILD. 
> 
> Part of my writing process is having a fic I consider my writing warm-up. Whenever I'm struggling to get the words flowing, I turn to my warm-up fic to get me going. Clowns was always so fun and the best warm-up fic I've ever had. But now there's a new story waiting, and Clowns has fulfilled it's promise of showing how this universe's Malex fall in love. So, it's time to say goodbye.
> 
> But not before we give the boys the happy ending they deserve! Happy Reading and thanks again.

They wake up the next morning tangled together in Alex’s bed. Sheets rumpled and hair tousled. Alex watches Michael sleep for thirty minutes until his breathing changes and a smile spreads across his face. ‘You’re such a creep.’ 

‘A creep who only has eyes for you.’ Alex laughs and pushes himself flush against Michael, licking into his mouth before his eyes have even opened. They make-out lazily, slowly letting their arousal burn to the surface. 

Michael pulls back even while Alex chases his lips. He flattens his palm on Alex’s chest to hold him at bay. ‘I want to tell you something.’

‘Oh my god, how can there be more after the _I’m an alien_ reveal. You’re trying to kill me, Guerin.’ His eyes are wide and his forehead creased. Michael kisses the sweet crinkles between his eyebrows unable to resist.

‘It’s nothing like that. Actually, it might be worse.’ But the shine in his eyes suggests nothing of the sort. 

Alex swats at his chest. ‘Don’t play games. I have an anxiety disorder.’

Michael’s phone starts buzzing on the nightstand. ‘Ugh.’

‘That thing’s been going off all morning. I think you should probably respond.’ Alex leans across Michael’s chest and grabs the phone, offering it to him with a smile. ‘You’re clearly avoiding someone.’

‘And you’re clearly avoiding my next confession.’ Michael takes the phone. ‘Besides, I already know who it is and what they want. Max is texting - _I’m disappointed in you, Michael_. And Isobel is texting - _Talk to your brother, Michael_.’

‘What did you do?’

‘I didn’t ask Max’s permission to tell you our little alien secret.’ Michael peeks at his text messages briefly and then tosses his phone aside. ‘Now, where were we?’ He pushes back against Alex. ‘Right, my confession.’

He stares at Alex for a long time. Too long and Alex starts to squirm beneath his gaze. ‘Spit it out, Guerin. You’re going to give me a heart attack.’

Michael straightens his face apologetically. ‘You’re right. I’m sorry. I just wanted to tell you that I love you.’ As soon as the words are out of his mouth, surprise tears wet his eyes and he tries to blink them away before Alex notices. But once they start to fall, he gives up. Alex brushes them away. ‘I wanted to tell you that, but not before you knew the whole truth about me.’

‘But you hardly know me. What about all of my secrets?’ It’s his turn to fight back tears which tugs thick at Michael’s heart. They are both well and truly lost.

‘Okay, then. Tell me your deepest, darkest secret. The one you’re most afraid to say out loud. Or you can tell me to fuck off. Your choice.’ 

Alex diverts his gaze, but Michael brings a hand up to cup his cheek and bring their eyes back together. ‘My service. The time I spent overseas. All the terrible things I did for no good reason. The people I killed.’ 

His voice cracks on the last word and Michael presses their foreheads together. ‘One day when you’re ready, you’ll tell me everything - lay it all down at my feet - and I will only love you harder.’

They lie quietly while Alex regains his composure. Michael massages his fingers through Alex’s hair and waits patiently. Eventually, Alex looks up at him. ‘I love you too. That’s not an easy thing for me to say. I mean, I’ve never actually said it. But it’s true. I love you.’

‘Yeah?’

‘Yeah. I also took the day off work. So, I’d be glad to spend the next several hours showing you just how much.’ Alex’s smile spreads in a wicked grin. ‘Liz had to ask me to repeat myself multiple times. I’ve never taken a day off for anything other than a doctor’s appointment.’

Michael laughs. ‘Well then, let’s slow this down. Take our time.’ He sinks between Alex’s thighs and they turn their words into touch and taste. Giddy and safe in each other’s arms. 

And that’s how this story ends. With two very happy and very in love cosmic clowns.

Oh, wait! One more thing.

**Epilogue**

_One year later_

Alex’s last client leaves at 9:30. He cracks his neck and stretches his arms over his head. Tax day is always the worst, but at least he’s going to make it home to Michael before midnight this year.

‘Is it okay if we leave, Mr. Manes?’ Lisa asks, still unwilling to call her new boss anything other than Mister. Jimmy stands behind her, laptop bag already slung across his shoulders.

‘Good night, you two. And take tomorrow off. See you Thursday.’ They both wave and Alex briefly misses Liz and Maria, but is happy they’ve moved on to greener pastures and their own dreams.

Alex sighs and starts shutting down his computer. He’s eager to get into his newly built studio now that tax season is finally over. Revenues are up 20% over the previous year. Maybe he’ll even record something with Michael soon - a song that he’s been writing for a while now. 

Just as he’s slinging his bag over his shoulder, Michael bursts through his office door, papers shaking in his fist. The chaotic energy Alex has come to know and love so deeply fully on display. ‘I need your help.’

‘Haha, funny.’ Alex smiles and starts to move around his desk. ‘I’m so ready to go home.’

But Michael stops him with a firmly placed hand on his chest. ‘I’m serious, Alex. These 1099s are from two years ago. I should have paid taxes on them last year and didn’t. It’s over $20,000 of income.’

‘Oh my god, Michael.’ Alex slumps back into this chair as Michael slides another one over. ‘How did you manage to forget $20K of income?’ He pulls his laptop back out and puts his head in his hands while he waits for the system to reboot.

‘I don’t know.’ Michael pushes his chair as close to Alex as he can get. ‘I’m terrible at this stuff.’

Alex looks at him wide-eyed. ‘No, you’re not. You’re meticulous about this stuff. Are you feeling okay?’

‘Fine, Alex. I’m fine. This was before you and me. A rougher time. Sorry to spring all of this on you at the last minute. Hell, it’s already a year late - maybe we should just disappear these forms and pretend like none of this ever happened.’ He tries to take the dozen or so 1099s from Alex’s hands. Knowing his effort is wasted.

‘Absolutely not. I can’t even fathom doing that.’ He clutches his heart at the mere thought. ‘I’ll fix this. It’s my job.’

Michael sits back and watches him work. Watches the way it takes several minutes for his eyes to focus and actually read the words on the forms. Watches the way his brow furrows and the lines across his forehead deepen. He flips through all the sheets. Once and then twice. ‘Can you fix it?’ Michael is grinning so hard it hurts.

‘You’re a monster. I was halfway to an actual panic attack.’ He throws the forms down on his desk and takes a deep breath. ‘You always think you’re so cute.’

‘Baby, I always know I’m so cute.’ He stares down at the nearest form, chuckling at the way each blank space is filled with two simple words - MARRY ME. ‘So? What do you think?’ He reaches out to squeeze Alex’s thigh.

‘How long have you been planning this?’ Alex finally looks at him, brows slightly less furrowed now.

‘About a year.’

Alex shakes his head. ‘There’s no way.’ But MIchael just returns his gaze, face deadly serious.

‘The first time I told you I loved you, I meant it. In a way I’d never meant anything before. The next day I told Isobel I wanted to marry you, and we came up with this idea. I’ve spent all year waiting for this moment.’ He shrugs and leans back in his chair. ‘You can ask her, if you want.’

Pushing up off his chair, Alex climbs into Michael’s lap, wrapping his arms around his neck. ‘I don’t deserve you.’ Before Michael can get mad, he tries again. ‘What I mean is, you love better than anyone on this planet. And I’m so lucky to have you.’

‘Is that a yes?’

‘It’s a yes.’ They kiss slowly and for a long time. Until the chair starts to strain underneath them.

‘I’ve got one more surprise.’ Michael grabs Alex’s laptop and shoves it back into his bag. They turn off the lights and walk out of Alex’s office hand-in-hand. The elevator ride down to the ground floor is quiet and relaxed. Once they push open the building’s front doors, however, the quiet vanishes.

‘Congratulations!’ Liz and Kyle immediately throw themselves into Alex’s arms. He looks around and finds all their friends and family waiting to do the same. Max and Isobel, Maria, Rosa visiting from New York, Greg and even Flint.

‘Tonight, the Wild Pony is closed for a private event. We’re throwing you two an engagement party. Just one of the perks of owning Roswell’s best dive bar.’ Maria hugs them both. ‘Lots of free booze, too.’

Everyone gets their hugs in and then runs off to find their cars. Michael flattens Alex against the side of his Chevy and kisses the breath from him. ‘I know surprise parties aren’t your thing - crowds either. So if you want to skip all that and go home with me, that’s perfectly okay. Great even.’ He slides his hands suggestively down Alex’s hips. ‘And they’ve been informed that’s what we might do. The choice is yours.’

‘I want to go. I want to celebrate with everyone we love. And then you can take me home and ask me to marry you properly - with your tongue and your teeth and those brilliant fingers of yours.’ He grins up at Michael. ‘Deal?’

Michael steps back onto the sidewalk and opens the passenger door for Alex. ‘Deal.’

As Michael pulls away from the curb, the Cosmic Clowns, CPA light flickers to life, glowing faintly against the night sky and haloed by the stars shining overhead.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading. Cross-posted to @litwitlady on Tumblr.


End file.
